


To Lose, But to Gain

by Kileyalexa



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Jealousy, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:46:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27485983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kileyalexa/pseuds/Kileyalexa
Summary: (Y/N) has been friend with James Potter since she was a little girl. His parents considered her their daughter. She moved into the Potter residence after her family joined the Dark Lord, much like Sirius. But what happens when Fleamont and Euphemia dies, leaving James broken? (Y/N) helps to comfort James in his time of need, while trying to battle her own feelings.**Lily is in this, but I have portrayed her as kinda mean. Jealously is an evil thing. I am not sure when I’ll the next part up. Hopefully soon. Feedback welcome. Request open!***
Relationships: James Potter/Reader, Lily Evans/James Potter, Remus Lupin/Platonic!Reader, Sirius Black/Platonic!Reader, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 26





	To Lose, But to Gain

March 12th, 1979 was seemingly the worst day of your, but it was nothing compared to how you know James felt. It was only four months; four months since James cried on your shoulder after his parents told him that they both had contracted Dragon Pox. The doctors said the potions wouldn’t help much, but they took them anyway in hopes of sending just a little more time with James. Four months was seemingly a decent amount of time, but she could only wish for more as she stood next to her friends in a room full of strangers. 

Aurora pressed a gentle kiss to Sirius’s cheek before passing him off to Remus. She weaved her wave through the throngs of people till she reached James at his mother's casket. Aurora pressed her hand into James’s back causing him to turn towards her. His cheeks were sunken in with dark bags under her eyes, and tried tear tracks running down his face. He grabbed her hand to pull her into his side. She leaned her head onto his shoulder as the onslaught of memories that lead to this spiral of grief crashed onto her. 

Sirius, Lilly, Remus, and Aurora have all been staying at the Potter residence, with Peter joining every now and then, after Euphemia got bedridden on March 8th. Although James was their only child, Fleamont and Euphemia considered all those currently staying in their house their children. The Potter house was a safe haven for all those who came, something that all of them, especially Sirius and Aurora, knew and loved. But that all seemed to crack when Sirius let out a gut wrenching cry for the woman who had taken Aurora and himself in when their own parents kicked them out. 

He was the first to notice when Euphemia stopped breathing. Tears fell down Aurora’s face as she turned to watch James breakdown at the sight of his father kissing his mother one last time. He didn’t utter a word as his father brought him into a hug, crying with his son over the woman they both loved. Aurora took Sirius’s hand to pull him, along with Remus, and Lily out of the room to give James and Fleamont some time with Euphemia. She wiped her tears knowing that it was going to be a long and hard couple of days for everyone, and that she needed to stay strong.

When she reached for the door handle, but halted when she heard Fleamonts voice, “Aurora, princess stay. You are just as much a part of this as James and Sirius.” 

She looked up at the man who had loved her as his own since she showed up on their doorstep at the age of seven asking to play with James. She glanced up at Remus who nodded at her, “Go, I’ll take care of it. James needs you. They all do.” 

No one seemed to notice the look of jealousy that passed on Lily's face when she saw James bury his head into Aurora’s neck. The trio plus Fleamont stayed with Euphemia till St. Mungos came to take her body. Shortly after Fleamont pressed a kiss to their foreheads, before retiring to the guest room down the hall since he almost collapsed from exhaustion. The time James hadn’t released his hold on Aurora. They moved to join the others in the living room where Peter had joined Lily, and Remus. The latter had set up mattresses on the floor for everyone already expecting that they all would want to be close.   
Aurora gently untangled her hand from James’s, but the look of panic in his eyes made her quick to explain, “Stay here. I’ll be back soon. I’m gonna go check on dad, okay?” 

James nodded his approval. Aurora would have to talk to Remus if James didn’t speak sometime soon. But she quickly decided that it could wait till at least tomorrow since she currently didn’t feel like talking very much either. She squeezed his hand before looking at Lily who had stepped up next to James. Lily grabbed his hand and pulled him to the mattress on the end.   
When she was sure James would be okay for a little bit she made the trek down the hall to Fleamont. She knocked softly before pushing the door open when she heard an entry call. 

“Hey, sweetheart,” Fleamont greeted the young girl who he had grown to consider his daughter and his son's happiness. 

Aurora forced a small smile onto her face, crossing the room to sit on the edge of his bed to get a better look to see what he had in his hand. The forced smile on her lips quickly turned into a real one when she saw what it was. The picture he was holding was a wizard photo that played on a loop. It was taken their 4th year when Sirius had moved into the Potter's house. The family, James, Fleamont, Aurora, Euphemia, and Sirius, were gathered at a Christmas tree farm on a snowy day. The older couple was laughing while Fleamont dipped his wife back to kiss her as the group of teens made gagging noises. It was easily one of Aurora’s favorite memories. 

Aurora hadn’t noticed the tears leaking from her eyes till she felt a hand on her cheek wiping them away. “Don’t cry. We will all be together again someday. She wouldn’t want the sadness instead remember all the happy times we had, and I want the same when I’m gone.” 

That caused her head to snap up, “Wh-what?”

“It won’t be long now. Especially now that I know that all three of the kids will be taken care of by each other and Remus. All parents want for their children is that they are supported and loved. You and James do that for each as do Remus and Sirius.” 

The sobs that had been stuck in her throat came out full force. She begged him not to leave them so soon, that they needed him. Fleamont pulled her into a hug, “All you need is each other and you have that more than you realize. Hold on to one another, love each other, don’t let things go unsaid. And remember the ones that love us never really leave us, you can always find them in here.” He placed his hand over her heart before kissing her forehead. “Now, go. Hug my boys for me and Mia. Tell them we love them just like we love you.” 

Aurora nodded softly before pressing a kiss to his cheek, and helping him get comfortable in bed. Unbeknownst to the two Lily had heard all of the conservation after she was sent to get Aurora when Sirius asked for her. 

Rest was not seen very well for the group. Peter had taken the shorter sofa, and could be heard tossing and turning. Remus took the larger sofa, but instead of sleeping he was reading Mrs. Potter had given him for Christmas. James and Lily had taken the mattress furthest from the sofas; James was curled in on himself pretending to be asleep, but couldn’t actually sleep too afraid of nightmares he knew would come. Lily had fallen asleep a little bit after she thought James was, but kept moving every couple of minutes. Sirius had curled up in between Remus' sofa and the girl who he considered a sister. His head on her chest while she played with his hair while he played with Remus’s free fingers. The hours passed slowly, but no one dared to speak. The emotional exhaustion seeped into their bones and finally they fell into a fitful sleep. 

When Aurora woke a few hours later the first thing she noticed was the second body on her other side. James had woken up from a nightmare and quietly left his bed to join her and Sirius. Sirius had tucked into her shoulder so James had laid his head on her stomach with his body in between her legs. Her hand was tangled with his much like all the other times they had done this while talking about nothing yet everything. She looked out the window to see the light beginning to rise. Knowing that she wouldn’t be going back to sleep, she slipped out of the boys grasped and tip-toed down to where Fleamont was staying. She wanted to see if he was awake before she woke James and Sirius so they could spend the day with him. But those plans came to a stuttering halt when she noticed the bluish tint to Fleamont’s skin. 

Her breath hitched in her throat as she prayed to whoever was listening that he was breathing. He wasn’t. Her tears dripped down onto his cold skin as she kissed his forehead. She sank to the floor in the corner of the room sobbing quietly, while she tried to gather herself to go wake the others and break the news. She buried her head in her arms as she pulled her knees to her chest crying as if it would be her last. She wasn’t sure how long she had been sitting there, but when she felt arms wrap around her, and tears hit the top of her head causing her to jump. 

“I’m so sorry, Jamie,” she whispered. 

James sniffled, “It’s okay. He’s with Mum now. I-I talked to him this morning. I wa-was with him when he….I waited to tell everyone. I wanted some time with him and I figured that you and Sirius would want to say goodbye.” 

Aurora understood where he was coming from. And although these were his parents he was still thinking of his friends who loved his parents as their own. She was glad that James got to see his Dad one last time. This would be the first time that James had ever faced a loss as big as this one. “This maybe a stupid question, but are you okay? 

She raised her head to look at his face, wiping his tears with her thumbs. He smiled pitifully, “Okay? No. Will I be, eventually? Yes.” He shifted them so that her legs were over his with her head on his shoulder, and her playing with the fingers of his left hand while his right ran down her back. “He, um, told some stuff before he…..” James couldn’t bring himself to say the ‘D’ word, but Aurora understood what he meant. “He said that I was a great son, and that he and Mum were so proud of me. And that the only regret they had was that they wouldn’t be able to see me marry the woman I love.” 

Aurora tried to keep her face as blank as possible while she remembered the words the Fleamont had told her last night while processing what James had said. Was Fleamont talking about her when he said those words to James? Aurora had been battling feelings for her Best friend since their sixth year, but had been working her hardest to get over them knowing that James loved Lily. “Yeah, they always loved Lily.” 

Aurora missed the look of longing in James’ eyes as she turned towards the doorway after a creek came from the floorboards. Remus, Sirius, and Lily were all there looking at the cold body of Fleamont Potter. Sirius turned, shoving passed the others, storming into the kitchen. 

Remus gave the two on the floor a sympathetic smile, “I’ve got him.” Before following Sirius out.

Lily made her way over to James as Aurora kissed Fleamont’s cheek one last time before heading towards the door, “I’ll send word to St. Mungos, so you can have a little more time with him, Jamie.” 

“Thank you, but can you come back once you're done? I-I don’t want to be alone.” 

“I’ll stay, James,” Lily said, grabbing onto his hand. 

James kept his eyes trained on Aurora who was looking at Lily. “Please, princess? I just need someone who-who understands. Please?” 

The nickname sent a pang of hurt straight through her heart. Fleamont was the one who gave her it, but the boys quickly picked up on it. Being the only girl in the Mauraders meant she was the princess of the group even when Lily entered. Despite the hurt it sent her, it also made her incredibly relieved that James was talking. She knew that she would do whatever it took to make sure James was going to be okay. Aurora locked eyes with James, nodding softly. She noticed that beside James Lily was glaring softly, but was smart enough to make sure that James didn’t see it. “I’ll send an owl, and then we can stay as long as you want.” 

****************

She blinked back tears as she was brought back to the present by James tugging on her hand to move to his father's casket. The duo stayed even after people started moving to where the drinks were. Aurora noticed James looking around the room slightly, “We can stay here as long as you want, you know?” 

“I know, but I-I said my goodbyes already. I just needed to look at them a little longer, but I think I’m ready now.” His voice hoarse. 

“Whenever you know you’re ready is when we leave. Not before that.” Aurora whispered into his shoulder where her forehead was resting. 

“I just want them to be at peace with each other.” James linked his fingers through hers. Aurora nodded before guiding him to where everyone else was. The room was packed with people who knew the Potter’s. She spotted Remus, who had Sirius buried in his shoulder, in the corner of the room. She began to pull James towards them, but was stopped by multiple people who were giving James his condolences, and letting him know that they were there for him. From the look on James’s face she could tell he had no clue who half of these people were. One particularly old wizard didn’t seem to notice the look on his face, and kept talking about something she didn’t catch. She could tell that James was getting close to losing it. 

“I’m sorry, sir. But you’ll have to excuse us.” She didn’t wait for a reply before leaving with James in tow. She pushed James into a chair beside Remus, loosening his tie slightly so he could breathe a little better. “I’m going to get you some water. Do you want anything else, Jamie?” 

He shook his head. On the way to the drinks, Aurora passed Lily who was talking with Marlene and Docras. The latter sent a small smile when she noticed her while the other two just looked at her. Aurora grabbed some water for both James, and Sirius, knowing that Remus would share with Siri if he wanted some, as well as a chocolate chip muffin hoping that she could get James to eat at least a couple of bites. Upon arriving back to the boys, she was greeted by the sight of Minevera McGonagall who was talking to James. She was still too far away to hear what was being said, but whatever it was caused James to smile despite the tears running down his face. Leave it to Minnie to be the one who makes him smile for the first time in days, Aurora thought. 

McGonagall hugged James before moving to speak to Sirius and Remus. Minnie gave her a hug as she walked past, letting her know to contact her if she or any of them needed someone to talk to. Although they had all graduated over a year ago, they all still kept in touch with their favorite professor. 

Aurora handed a water to Remus before going to James. Lily stood beside his chair looking down at him. “Do you want or need anything else?” James shook his head before leaning onto Aurora’s shoulder as she perched on the arm of his chair so she could quietly talk to Remus. Without thinking about it Aurora started to run her fingers through James’s already messed up hair making the boy relax into her side. 

Remus noticed James' position on his other friend. He was worried about his three best friends. They had lost the only parents they had ever known within days of each other. He knew that Aurora was trying to stay strong for Sirius and James, but was forgetting herself. Yes, she had cried some, but she hadn’t talked about any of it. Truthfully Remus knew that she had feelings for James. It became obvious when she turned slightly red faced in their sixth year when James cuddled her on the Common Room couch, but she never told anyone. Remus loved Aurora like the little sister he never got to have. Besides Sirius she was the one he was closest too; she was his person. Just like he knew he was hers. This only made Remus want to make sure that she was going to be okay since she wouldn’t do that for herself. “How are you doing, Aurora?”

“Uh? Oh, I’m okay. Just trying to keep an eye on Jamie the best that I can.” She glanced down at the brown eyed boy noticing that his breaths were starting to even out. Remus also noticed that James was essentially asleep on Aurora, prompting him to ask how James was sleeping. They all, minus Peter and Lily most nights, had been staying at the Potter residents, not leaving one another alone for more than a few minutes at a time. “He keeps having nightmares. We’ll try to go to sleep in our own rooms, but either I’ll wake up to him kicking the wall or him crawling into my bed. I think they are getting a little better, but not much. He slept a little more than two hours before he woke up. Granted we just slept in my bed last night not even trying to sleep alone.”

“I know that you are trying to make sure that he is okay or is going to be okay, but you need to take care of yourself too. We’ll take care of James tonight. You need some sleep, I can tell. Sirius usually sleeps through the night if he takes the Draught of Peace, right Siri?” Remus said looking at his lover. 

Sirius nodded, “I do, but he won’t let you take over Rem. He won’t be able to go back to sleep if he wakes up with a nightmare, and that’s if he lets her go long enough for her to even get into her bed.” He tilted his head towards James showing the other two the tight grip James had on Aurora’s waist with one arm, and her hand with the other. 

“He’s right, ya know.” James’s voice startled the trio. “You keep the nightmares away, princess. Always have. I know you need sleep too, and you can just please stay with me? All I need is your presence, I promise.” 

Aurora nodded softly at James, squeezing his hand. James looked at his friends, “Can we please leave? I can’t be here any longer.”

They all stood to make their way to the apparition point. Remus leading holding onto Sirius’s hand with Aurora following holding onto James. Someone caught James’s other hand, he looked back to see Lily. “Where are you going, James?” 

“Oh, um, home. I can’t- I can’t be here any longer.” He stopped to talk to his girlfriend causing the other three to wait on him. “Um, you can come over later if you want. I just need some time.” 

Lily nodded, “Okay, I will. Are you sure you’ll be okay alone for a while?” Lily already knew that James wasn’t going home alone. She knew that at least Aurora was going to be with him. And she tried to look past it. Thinking that they were just best friends who were leaning on each other in a time of need, but she couldn’t help to notice the touches, and some looks passed between the two. 

“I won’t be.” He tilted his head in the direction of Sirius, Aurora, and Remus. “They’ll be with me. Just come over later or something. I have to go.” He was getting overwhelmed at all the looks of sympathy getting sent his way. He didn’t wait for Lily to reply before walking past his friends, and apperating home.

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my Tumblr @ SimplyMagicallyWriting


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